Negotiation

"Let us never negotiate from fear, but let us never fear to negotiate"

-John F. Kennedy

Negotiation is a critical skill. Regardless of your profession, position, or objective - negotiation is involved in success. JFK's inaugural address in 1961 addressed negotiation in the context of world powers and the responsibility to defend freedom.  How do you negotiate?

EVERYTHING: Jocko Willink's October 2022 interview with Chris Voss is a negotiation master class on negotiation. This 3 hour 54 minute conversation between Jocko (US Navy Seal & Leadership Coach) and Chris (FBI Hostage Negotiator & Consulting CEO) is a long listen, but well worth it.  Learn all of the below, and more, by checking it out.

1. Two approaches to negotiation: Rationale Selfish People (Academic) vs. Tactical Empathy (FBI)

2. Four negotiation tactics

  • Mirroring - Repeat what other party says/does to create a bond of commonality

  • Boundaries - Use negotiation as a discovery of other party's boundaries

  • Pace - Slow it down to increase the information you gather in process and quality of decision you make with information

  • Emotion - Don't feel the emotion, label it and use it as a tool to de-escalate

3. Reasons NOT to > Reasons To. Define why not, then pursue why yes.

4. Most powerful word in negotiation: "That's Right"

5. Reason: Why not to negotiate for fear of loss, or to save face, but instead for a specific outcome

6. Anchoring: How to shift a negotiation by anchoring counter-party to a reality immediately after start

7. Types of Negotiators:

  • Analyst: Understand the situation, not the person

  • Accommodator: Anxious for a quick win & uses hope to address long term

  • Assertive: Matter of Fact

8. Questions: How to ask calibrated questions to inspire expansive answers

9. Types of Leverage

  • Positive

  • Negative

  • Normative

10. How to make, or detect, subtle changes the other side makes which can change everything

PRIORITIES: Patrick Bet David, the leader of Valuetainment, has a much shorter class on negotiation available - this one available in only 14 steps of how NOT to negotiate, by highlighting common mistakes.  Check it out here, and see my top 3 priorities below!

  1. Clarify the position: Many negotiations are destined for failure from the outset as positions are poorly defined.  Take the time to understand the other side, and clearly define your own.

  2. Be clear about how you work: Make sure the other party knows your work process.  If your business requires a long term commitment immediately in order to be successful, be confident to ask for it.  This will set the stage for success.

  3. BATNA: Define your needs, be clear about how you work, and have a Best Alternative To Negotiated Agreement (BATNA) so that you can appropriately anchor your needs.  Whether long term or short term, always understand what your alternative is.

TIP: PRACTICE

Do not let Negotiation be an act of battle that you use only in disagreement, but instead a discovery of the other sides' position. Use negotiation more frequently, and learn from it. More importantly use it as a tool to create solid outcomes both parties can support.

Stay Productive. 

Joe House